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➽ I’m the pilot of this airplane called "Family". It’s not easy to the kid’s mind to comprehend why parents, and not them, give orders. Therefore, the plane analogy. Daddy and I are the pilots, and the kids are the passengers. We are adults and established our principles and lifestyle. We have set a destination, and we are flying directly to it. Sometimes we make mistakes and have to get off our route and make a new flight plan. Other times, the passengers won’t like the decisions we make. There even are times where we turn to them, consult, and make decisions together. Either way, we always follow our hearts to what we think it’s best for our family.
➽ Rules are always important. When our kids understand that we as adults also follow the rules to be a part of the family, social groups, and society, it becomes a little bit easier to comprehend the rules we try to apply. That is why the examples that make explicit those rules that govern our coexistence as adults are a great tool to teach them to trust us as an authority.
➽ Trust instead of fear. If we carefully start explaining from the moment they are born the decisions we make, where we go at night, what we are having for dinner, or what are the plans for the day, kids will understand that they are a part of the crew and will trust us no matter what. We want to follow our leadership. The last thing we want is them following our rules out of fear towards a bad reaction from our part. If they don't agree with us, we must let them know why we are applying those rules to help them develop their trust in us.
➽ Which decisions are open for negotiations? There will be times that some decisions can be discussed as a family, like what kind of pj’s they can use when it’s bedtime. And there are some other situations, like bedtime, that are not opened for discussion. It’s essential that parents know what rules can or cannot be flexible and keep in mind these rules may vary depending on the family.
➽ Trust me, they might even call you a witch. When it comes to authority, we know our kids will disagree with us from time to time. Sometimes we’ll come off as bad parents, and they’ll find our rules pointless. They’ll even come up with some outrageous phrases, such as “you are a mean witch” or “you are too bossy”. Those words might hurt us. But we as parents must understand that, even though some rules are hard to follow, they are important. Keep clear your role as a parent. With love and respect, encourage them to follow your lead to reach a more harmonious life.
Putting these recommendations on how to make your kids listen into practice usually takes time to help us stay consistent in decisions. Your mission is to train them to be good citizens aware of how their actions impact on the lives of others.